Having an affair with a gay guy????

[Ivy]

My situation is really weird. I'm a married woman for seven yrs. For the first couple of years, we were inlove and happy. The last 2 1/2 yrs is a struggle. I thought of divorce a year ago but I dont want to hurt our 7 yr old daughter. We hardly talk to each other and not to mention our sex life has gone downhill. I'm not sure if he's pushing me away purposely. Right now we're not ready to split up because he's opening a new business and I will be screwed if I leave him. I have a good career and make decent living . I know I will be ok if I decided to leave but he buried me with so much debt. For years, my life is centered to my family. I dont go out with friends or drink because I'm a fitness enthusiast until recently I decided to go out and party. I met this guy who's 8 yrs younger than I am. I've known him for a year through myspace but we didnt meet until recently. He now works for the same company but not working together. I'm 34 but people said I look so young for my age. It's my asian gene I guess. I'm confident to say that I'm quite attractive woman and always get hit on wherever I go. After I met this guy, I was attracted to him instantly but dont want to do anything about it because I'm married!. We go out together with friends. Then one night, after we partied I headed home and so is he. Got a text fr him asking me if I'm still in the mood to party. I was curious whats it like to be with a hot young guy. We had another drink, make out and went down on him. I was way too scared to have sex since I've never done that before. Eventually, I gave in and we had sex 2x. Seriously, I dont even want to touch my poor hubby because all I'm thinking is this hot guy. He's single and I wonder why. He said he just got out of a relationship because the girl wants to get married and he's not ready for that He's also a professional, responsible, owns his place and very attractive. My girlfriends always tells me they will leave their boyfriends to be with this guy. None of our friends knew what's going on bet. me and the him bec. I'm way so embarrassed of my actions. My dilemma right now is I feel he's gay. I told him that whatever it is, I dont want to be serious about us and I just want to have fun and he said the same thing as well. We're screwing each other for fun! Over the weekend I'm trying to get him out of my system because I'm falling for him and I'm afraid if I tell him that I love him, then he'll walk away. I'm so confused. He has a lot of gay mannerisms I thought he could be one. Is he playing me???because he's still in the closet. What I dont get was : He always tell me call him if I'm bored but never told me he likes me and vice versa. When we see each other, we hang out, talk about life then have sex. After that I go home happy. My husband is never home even on weekends. I have a feeling he's waiting for me to end the relationship. What shall I do???Pls help!!!