Whom should I date ???

[Thoughts2Page]

I’m a female student and I am seriously confused about my sexuality. I spend most of my social life getting drunk, so that I don’t have to face this problem. I have dated guys, but I never get very close to them. Girls make me feel safe and I can relate better to them. I may sound like I am straight and they are just best friend, but I recently met a girl at university and took an instant liking to her and dated her a few times –that’s different to the way I feel about my other mater; I just want to be near her. I’d love to tell her about my feelings, but I don’t know her well enough and she can blab to other and made my life a misery.

Should I date men only, am I straight?

Kate Jones

Hi Kate,

I guess the first thing I want to say is, please don't drink to mask or try to ignore your feelings. Getting drunk isn't going to make things clearer.

You say you've "dated" this girl a few times ... but you don't know her well enough to speak frankly with her. I don't think you should feel pressured to "pour your heart out" to anyone new in your life. Take your time with her and see if there really is something between you. If there is, you'll know when the right time comes along to discuss your deeper feelings. At this point, it sounds like you don't quite trust her enough to do that.

Only you can ultimately decide on your sexuality. As others have suggested, if you are really conflicted, getting some help in the form of someone trustworthy and objective to talk to would be a great idea. You seem to fear what others will think of you if you are "not straight." Having someone to support you will be important, particularly if your family and friends are not open to alternative lifestyles.

Don't be afraid to be who you are... follow your heart

E.